We need extra-large fish hooks and more women as heads of state

A few days ago, I very nearly earned the imbecile of the week award (and if there isn’t one, there should be).

I had put two plastic shopping bags on the back seat of the car; one containing some old summer clothes destined for Goodwill, the other contained a brand new bathing suit which I planned to return to T.J. Maxx.

As I reached the end of Hotchkiss Grove, I noticed a small container for used clothing on the right side of the road and decided that would be an even quicker drop-off than stopping at Goodwill. I pulled over and then, always in a hurry, I grabbed a plastic bag and tossed it down the chute.

It wasn’t until I reached the store that I realized I had inadvertently grabbed the wrong bag and had just donated a brand new bathing suit. Feeling annoyed and foolish, I drove back to the “scene of the crime” and looked at the container.

The container was completely secure, although there was a name and phone number on the front. Wishing I had a long fishing hook of some kind, I drove home dejectedly.

However, it started me thinking about the many things we sometimes do in haste and then regret: the criticism uttered that we wish we could recall, the action taken without enough forethought or the ill-conceived plan because we had an idea and hurried to get the desired result.

This also brought to mind the numerous recent scandals caused by several famous men known for their brilliant minds who did such stupid things that one can only think they must have momentarily blacked out.

I’m sure both former Gov. Schwarzenegger and U.S. Rep. Anthony Weiner, along with Eliot Spitzer, Mark Sanford, John Edwards and Sen. David Vitter all wish they had that long fishing hook of recall, but today’s lightning rod media movement gives no one a second chance. And I have only mentioned Americans in government who have strayed.

The list would be considerably longer if it included Europeans and Hollywood men.

According to David C. Geary, professor of psychological sciences in Missouri, men who pursue politics are also pursuing power, and one reason they don’t even think about getting caught is that there seems to be a correlation between testosterone and risk-taking with severity of the consequences underestimated.

Geary added that “women, on the other hand, tend to focus on the potential harm of the consequences.” Now I ask you, dear readers, could there be a better argument not only for worldwide woman suffrage, but also for having the female sex as heads of state?

We would probably achieve an end to wars, a balanced budget with money left over for outstanding schools and social programs to cover the young, the poor and the elderly.

The men, meanwhile, could put all that testosterone and competitive spirit to building better interstate highways, developing innovative ways to save the environment, and vying with one another to see who would be anointed the next “Iron Chef.”

Incidentally, using my good feminine logic and powers of persuasion, I called and left several messages with the phone number of the charity listed on the aforementioned collection container.

Eventually, “Chick” responded and told me when he would be emptying said container, waited for me, and I was able to rescue the errant plastic bag with bathing suit intact.

P.S.: Chick was a real gentleman, and didn’t even try a fanny pinch as I bent over to retrieve the bag.

- Article by Jean Cherni, founder of the retirement advisory service, Senior Living Solutions. Contact her at jeancherni@sbcglobal.net or 15 The Ponds at Hotchkiss Grove, Branford 06405.

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